Forgotten Friday - Erin's Inside Job

Forgotten Friday

Happy Friday!

I usually spend Fridays recounting the things that I am loving this week, but I wanted to take today to talk about things forgotten that I want to make sure that I remind myself.  It is easy for me to brush unpleasant and sub optimal times in my life aside or forget them all together.  I am very good at compartmentalizing and I used it as a coping mechanism growing up and during the times I was using.  I became so good at it that it’s second nature to me and if I am not careful, I will push away things that I need to deal with in order to avoid undesirable feelings.

One of the things that I want to remind myself of is that I didn’t always eat well.  If you’ve read my About Me page, you know that my relationship with food was often confusing at best and disordered at worst.  I have had people say that they will never be able to eat the way that I eat and seem to elevate me to some kind of clean eating guru.  What I was reminded of yesterday was that I did not start off that way.

When I moved in with Neil, my diet consisted of roast beef sandwiches from Subway on flat bread with mayo and cheese and chocolate chip cookies every day.  When I was using I would buy gallons of Cold Stone and eat them on the couch.  When I stopped going to meetings and exercise became my new addiction, I went to the opposite extreme and limited my food intake based on calories, sugar, whatever.

It wasn’t until I did some work on myself and gained some acceptance that I was able to shift to a more intuitive model of eating.  I stopped looking at calories and I ate good foods when I was hungry.  I didn’t deny myself sweets if I wanted them; I just found that the less sugar I ate on a regular basis, the less I craved it.  It took me YEARS to get to where I am today, so you shouldn’t expect to change your lifestyle overnight.  Be compassionate with yourself.  Love yourself.

I wanted to remind myself of that because it has now become commonplace for me to choose healthier eating options and I can convince myself that it was always easy for me.  It wasn’t.  I don’t think it’s easy for anyone (if it is, props to you!).  A healthy perspective and some compassion go a long way and it is possible to do anything you want to if you are willing.




Question of the day: What’s something you want to remind yourself about?

3 comments on “Forgotten Friday

  1. Loved this post. And it’s a great reminder that changes like these don’t happen over night. It can be easy to look at someone else’s journey and think “Why am I not there, too?” but it’s different for everyone and it can be a long road!

  2. What a good reminder! It is so easy to see what other people are posting on social media and think “Why can I not eat like that???” (I know I’m guilty of it sometimes), but we forget that they might not ALWAYS eat that way. That sometimes we’re just seeing the best (or cleanest) of their food choices. It’s so easy to forget that bloggers and instagrammers are real people too!

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